I wish I was writing more. Idk, I seem to have lost my inspiration. So much is happening here in the states, and I want to get involved. I am working in behavioral health and my job is being affected by the Administration. It’s so frustrating. There are so many people that can’t get housing, or even food and I can’t do much about it. I hate having to tell people that they can be on the housing list for a decade because there is no longer funding. Or that they can’t even have therapy because of lack of funding. There are so many people who need help, and I can’t do anything to help them. You would think that would be inspirational, but it’s not. It’s so infuriating. Anyway, I hope to get inspired soon. And hopefully positively inspired. Anyway.l, that’s where I am right now.
In the deepest pit of despair
When hope feels completely lost
There is nothing to grab on to
But then the dawn breaks
And light leads you
Back to a place of balance
And yet, there in the hopeful sunshine
You are more alone
Than when you disappeared
Into that dark pit
You are ready to embrace
The peace and joy
That eluded you
And you have to do it alone
Staying sane and hopeful
Alone
Alone
Alone
Have another first kiss
Hold hands with someone who makes my palms sweat
Know what it’s like
To not be alone
Will I ever
Watch the sunrise again
After a long night of talking
Know what it’s like
To be ok
Will I ever
Catch a snowflake with my eyelashes
Or feel one melt on my tongue
Know what it’s like
To be free
When did your heart let me go
What was the last straw
When did I stop being yours
Was it when I stopped being me
When did you decide to leave
Was I already gone
When will you come back
I’m back to me again
When will you be coming back
Will you be coming back
Demons in my head
Get louder everyday
Only so many pills
Can be taken
To drown them out
But there’s always an echo
Of the demons in my head
Will they ever go away
Add therapy to the pills
To drown them out
But there’s always an echo
Of the demons in my head
Always an echo
Always an echo
Always an echo
Of the demons in my head
Losing my mind
Losing time
Days go by
Going nowhere
In my head
Losing time
Days go by
Going nowhere In
In my bed
Losing time
In my head
Going nowhere
Days go by
When will time stop
Long enough
For me to get
Out of my head
Out of my bed
Or will days go by
Leaving me stuck
In my head
In my bed
As days go by
Reaching that high
When all seems to
Piece together
Time is in sync
Lovers in tune
Life is bliss
At first sight
I have been convicted
Of lacking beauty
Imprisoned to the
Corner of the room
Bled of all confidence
Seeking a reprieve
Just this once
To plead my case
Reveal the whole
Truth of my existence
The beauty
Behind these bars
A deliberate target
The monsters charm
Reeled me in
I deserted all
Contradicting instincts
The object of my desire
Dominates my every thought
Every action
Feeds him
Unknowingly, I had become
But a play thing
A soon to be
Discarded object
B.A. Wilcox © 