That Place

I’m in that place again 

where no one knows how to deal

With my shit

To them isn’t real

I hurt inside

So I hurt myself outside

I don’t expect you to deal

With what I am going through

Something very real

I can’t explain why

I hurt myself so

Except that it feels right

When I am so low 

I think it helps

I think it’s the way

I will choose and 

Chase the pain away

But in the end

I only feel

A physical pain that is real

A pain that leads

To more pain as I heal

Embarrassed to show my wounds

But also asking others to feel

Something for me

To try and understand

That this is who I will be

I don’t want it to be who I am

But it is what it is

I am me and you are you

I hurt myself

And you keep to you